Mindy Kaling wrote a tutorial on how to have "killer confidence" for a young girl in the Sept. 2015 issue of Glamour magazine. Kaling explained that the girl had asked her a question during a Q&A panel, but at the time she did not give her an adequate answer.
The actress put herself in a vulnerable place and shared that she too, once felt unattractive, stupid, and unskilled. Kaling said that she felt herself to be all three of those things and had "zero confidence" when she first began "The Office.'
Kaling shared that "confidence is just entitlement" and "like respect; you have to earn it." She said that her eleven years in Hollywood taught her that one must work hard in order to feel entitled. She added that successful people with long careers "exude confidence."
"It's just that, the truth is, I have never, ever, ever met a highly confident and successful person who is not what a movie would call a "workaholic." We can't have it both ways, and children should know that," wrote 36-year-old Kaling in Glamour.
Kaling shared that a teenage girl who looked to be around fifteen years old asked her a simple heartfelt question. She asked how Kaling was so confident, and added that she had been confident as a child, but lacked it in recent years. At the time, the "Mindy Project' star was tired and gave her a quick little answer.
Kaling told the girl that her confidence came from her upbringing, and that her parents always told her that she could do anything. The comedienne explained that she usually attributes her confidence to her "supportive parents" and her "strong sense of self."
After looking back to that one incident and reflecting her own choice of words, Kaling said that she felt guilty for giving the teenage girl such an incomplete answer. Kaling looked deep down for a real answer and wrote it in a form of an apology to the girl.
"Being expressive is important and I want you to feel like you are worthy of being heard, but there's value in listening, too. ...," wrote Kaling in a column for Seventeen magazine. "So when you finally take your place in the spotlight "” whether it's doing your own TV show or whatever it turns out to be "” you can put all those stored-up goodies to work."
